When I started Breakfast Daily, I had a goal. I was going to develop the habit of eating breakfast and get my family to do the same thing. Right. No one here is a breakfast eater. And it was something I wanted to change. I wanted us to be more like other families who get excited about What’s for breakfast? just as much as What’s for dinner? And, you know, putting the entire thing online was an incentive. Miss your goal and it’s public embarrassment. It’s been seven months since Breakfast Daily first went online and, my, after the initial attempts, I’m back to having coffee for breakfast.
It’s not for lack of anything. Not time, definitely. When we moved into this house, I managed to ditch the habit of working late into the night and sleeping into the day. I started going into a more regular sleeping pattern — bed by 10, up by 5.30 to cook the girls’ packed school lunches. But, for some reason, after immersing myself in the wonderful aromas and the endless tasting that go with cooking, by the time I should be having breakfast, my appetite would go on strike. And it didn’t help either that Speedy and the girls were always in a rush in the morning and never seemed to want breakfast either. There were a few weeks when I had breakfast ready for everyone at about the same time that the lunch boxes were packed. But I often got the feeling that I was begging them to notice what I had prepared. After a while, I just lost the momentum.
And then it got worse. When the weather started to change signaling the start of the summer, my sleeping pattern reverted to the late nights and bed until noon routine. I often cook more than what we can consume for dinner and set aside a portion that can be reheated for the girls’ packed lunches. Worst case scenario — I thaw a pack of chicken or fish fillets overnight in the fridge and the house helper fries them in the morning. And the girls have started to complain. Not that they whine but they have asked more than once why I don’t get up in the morning anymore. And it sucked. It made me feel like a total jerk — almost like an irresponsible mother who had let her kids down.
Then I realized that it’s all tied with why we still aren’t breakfast eaters. I guess I’m just not that kind of a regular person and my body clock works differently. I can’t eat breakfast just because everyone else does, and I am sure that it is something that Speedy, Sam and Alex can understand because they have difficulty forcing breakfast down their throats too. In the same way, I cannot command my body and my brain to go to sleep at an hour that’s defined as decent and on a schedule that is labeled as normal. And I just don’t want to feel bad about any of it anymore.
I write better at night when everyone else is asleep, period. I just have to find a better cooking schedule so that the girls can have the kind of packed lunches they’re used to. Home cooked food. Cooked by me. And I want to maintain the habit of being awake and alert when they get home from school so that we can have our afternoon snack together (in my bed — don’t ask why, I don’t know but it’s really fun that way) amid the chit chat about what happened in school and boys and all that stuff. But I don’t have to change me just so I can belong to that class called “regular people.”
So, am I ditching Breakfast Daily? No, we’re weekend breakfast eaters. More of brunch than breakfast, actually. Besides, Breakfast Daily is not just about food but also about health issues, studies and news. It stays.