When we decided to get married, the tell-the-parents part was hilarious and maddening at the same time. When we told my mother, the first thing she asked Speedy was how much his monthly salary was. When my brother (only sibling) heard, he told Speedy, “Condolence” and, in the next breath, told our mother to hire a live-in cook because I was moving out. How sweet.
When I told my father, he embarked on a verbally-abusive tirade. He said what would happen to my career? I stopped speaking to him for months until the day of the wedding. He referred to Speedy, whom he met only once, as the guy who “looked like Andrew E.” Amazing, when Speedy always insisted he looked like Brad Pitt while many of my relatives said he was a dead ringer for Bongbong Marcos. Of course, that was forty pounds or so ago.
No problem with Speedy’s family. They were thrilled except for the part that they wouldn’t agree on our no-church-wedding plan. What we wanted was to get married in blue jeans right in the living room of his family’s house. I told my mother (this was prior to her retirement as a judge) to get a friend-judge to come over and marry us. But, my future mother-in-law wanted a church wedding. Since we were going to live with them, I decided not to start by getting on the wrong footing with her. A church wedding was a big deal with her. We stood pat on the no-guests decision, however. Only family. We didn’t even have proper wedding sponsors, only our parents. And, of course, we didn’t wear blue jeans.
So, Valentine’s Day in 1991 was really the only Valentine that Speedy and I had alone. I was pregnant with Sam in 1992, a very delicate pregnancy that spelled complete bed rest. From 1993 through 2006, we spent Valentine’s Day with our two daughters — no candlelit dinners, no long-stemmed roses, no motel trysts, no out-of-town trips for two. We always celebrated Valentine’s Day as a family. It’s not going to be any different this year, or next year, or the year after that. See, that’s the way I want it. That’s the way we both want it.
Of course, we both know that in so many years, the girls would have their own plans for Valentine’s Day and there would just be the two of us again. In fact, over dinner sometime last week, Speedy asked the girls if they had dates because, if they had, he and I would make our own plans. It was a joke, of course. Sam is 14 and Alex is 13. And it’s not like he’s going to allow them to start dating right now. Him, of all people.
Speedy is in Subic today on a business trip. He called up to ask if I wanted to eat out tonight — with the kids, of course. I thought about it while I was baking some cookies. I decided, no, not with the Valentine crowd in restaurants. Instead, I asked him to bring home “sangkaterbang lechon, yosi and wine.”
Do I expect to get flowers? No… I like getting surprised with the occasional bouquet of flowers when there is no special occasion. In fact, that makes the gesture even more special — it relays the message that there need not be an occasion for my husband to give me flowers. It also says that the flowers were given because he felt like giving them and he knew I would be pleased. The gesture is not borne out of any sense of obligation nor expectation. It’s like Valentine’s Day can be any day of the year.
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Very belated Happy Valentines Ate Connie!
It was great reading your love story. You're not the big-grand-frilly-wedding kind of lady rin pala.
Sarap naman ng lechon.
I am so thrilled to hear how you and Speedy met. One day I will write mine which I wrote in my diary. Yes I kept a diary of our young love. We have never celebrated Valentine's day even when we were dating. I 'll write about it later as I am preparing a simple dinner. In the meantime, Happy Love day to us. May our love get even stronger.
how nice it is to go down memory lane. i agree, connie, that valentine's day can be any day in the year. happy valentine's day to you, speedy and the kids! (i too have a 13- and a 15-yr old girl. am glad that i retired early to grow with them).
hi connie, happy v-day! i'm not even half way through reading your love story, buy by the first paragraph pa lang, i felt so kilig and excited to read the rest of the entry.
and yup, i agree with you, giving flowers or any special gift for that matter should not be an obligation by either party, it should originate from a partner's desire to make his/her better half feel more special.
so i guess, it's another v-day tomorrow. enjoy the rest of the family dinner later.
hello ate sassy,
ang galing naman nitong istoryang ito, naiimagine ko ang mga eksena sa tagaytay, pati na ang "would-have-been" wedding ninyo sa sala, in your maongs. na touch naman ako sa sinabi mong in a few years, sila sam at alex ay magpaplano ng ng kanilang vday. haay…
this is great way to start my day. snow day ngayon dito kaya alang pasok.
enjoy your lechon, wine and yosi.
lemme rummage my fridge, i think i have a cold bottle of wine and leftover chicken wings. it's ni lechon, but it'll do. and i as i take a sip of wine and puff a smoke, i raise a glass to you ans speedy. happy valentine's day!
aaaaawww… that's so sweet… so did he brought home any?
happy valentine's day!
Thanks, and Happy Valentine's Day to you all!
Jop, we enjoyed half a bottle of wine then Speedy started snoring. haaaayyyy… Valentine everyday hahaha
i was a bit in dazed my first valentine w the swiss cheese he wanted something romantic
he probably had noticed my brows and facial expressions..
i said why not to the chinesse resto near his place
and he came with a big pot of plant.
hahaa
sha from fine dining to chinese resto? the pot of plant was the clincher hehehe but how romantic.
JMom, "it's cheaper to buy them after valentine's day."
Aye, true, flowers, dinner and chocolates are so terribly overpriced during Valentine's Day.
Re what Speedy told the girls. I think he was trying to convince himself that he has become more broad-minded? LOL
Lisa, salbahe ka hahahahaha You and the bruhas came to the house the day before the wedding so it wasn't that much of a shock ha.
He has a gun hahahaha and he cleans it regularly hahaha
re the disaster. oh, the one from the campaign. saka, bakit "which one"… kasi lahat disaster? hahahaha
Happy Valentine's Day too and hi to Nico.
Finally, after being your friend for 25 years, I get to read the love story you never made kwento. You forgot to mention that you sewed that beautiful wedding dress yourself! Yes, friends, Connie is the compleat woman! And she does have "b_g b__bs" to boot!
Well folks, here's the story: One day her good friends (or so we thought) receive a photo of Connie in a wedding gown, in front of an altar with a strange man whom we'd never met, who did look like Bongbong 40 pounds ago. And that's how we found out that she was married! It wasn't like we lost touch or anything. It wasn't like we were going to say anything bad about her in front of Speedy to turn him off. We weren't going to be like Peter, her favorite and only baby brother, and say, "Condolence." I guess it was just her idea of a semi-elopement. But Connie has always been romantic. I'm glad Speedy is, too.
They do have a wonderful marriage, thanks to Speedy, and the girls sound like they will turn out normal after all, despite the mom. Hahaha! He'll just have to buy a gun soon, or move from Antipolo to say, Batanes.
All my love to you, Connie. Happy Valentines!
p.s. which one was that disastrous 2-year relationship?
(please delete the first one. i only wanted to highlight the "read." am lousy with html codes still.)
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!
kami rin, we celebrate everything together, the five of us. Natawa ako dun sa sinabi ni Speedy dun sa dalawa about dating. as if!
hello!
those must have been your classmates or the FLAG ladies who went to your house the day before, not me. I just saw the photo you MAILED in the WINLAW room! hahaha.
it figures Speedy would have a gun. that should prevent this site from being renamed "the lola journals" or "the mommy-in-law journals" for many may years.
Our wedding photo in the WINLAW room? Susmaryosep! Talk about public knowledge hahahaha
Re: should prevent this site from being renamed "the lola journals"
hahahahahaha dapat lang! ayoko pa maging lola!
"speedy" talaga? i don't know if i just missed the explanation, but it would be nice to know how "speedy" and "sassy" came to be
you know I thought about and salivated over that "sangkaterbang lechon" the whole day yesterday after reading this… I still am. Hope you got it
.
LOL I did, dexie. We downed a whole kilo. At least na-save ako from cooking dinner
I was there sometime early on in the relationship…bakit wala akong special mention. Hu hu hu!
Hi Connie! I'm Mel from Summit. We're launching a new food magazine soon, so please drop me a message if you're interested to tie-up. Looking forward to hearing from you! =)
I can almost picture you narrating this story. hehe
hahahaha, AnP, ganun ba ka-expressive?
Congratulations, I hope you have 15 more happy years
http://www.meetfolks.com
Uy, Sam, oo nga naman, nandun ka before and after the wedding… and when my father was screaming at me on the phone hehehe
Mel, I e-mailed you.
rhodora, clear your browser cache.
Re pasalubong: some he did bring home; others, not. Yung sa Hyatt, wala, sobra daw bigat hahahaha
LOL! At last, my request is granted! Hehehe. I didn't see this posted yesterday though, how come?
"See, I never asked him for anything expensive — I just wanted unique "pasalubong."
Unique "pasalubong" nga – pero ang hirap naman! Was he able to bring all those rocks and other mementos as per your request? That letter from Hyatt Terraces signage, for example – I wonder.
Natawa ako doon sa selling point ng friend mo… on your big assets.. LOL!
Thanks for this, Connie… Hindi naman corny ito, a. Cute nga, e. And I like that part when you would both go to Tagaytay and gaze at Taal Lake. So sweet!
Belated Happy Valentine's Day!