Last night, we arrived home at 8.20 with a trunk full of grocery bags. I rang the doorbell, no one opened the front door. Thinking that the house helpers didn’t hear, Speedy opened the front door with his key, I proceeded out back and knocked on the helpers’ room to tell them that there were a lot of grocery bags to bring in. No one answered. I knocked again, still no answer. Sam took a flashlight and peeped through the window. The bedroom was empty. Right there and then, I decided the helpers had to go.
I’ve kept my cool with these helpers’ hit-and-miss cleaning. I’ve never made an issue about their four to five-hour afternoon naps (sometimes even longer and they wouldn’t come out of their room until sundown) which meant I had to stop writing to go down and answer the door every time the mailman or the mineral water delivery service came. I had our bedroom flooring repaired one afternoon a few weeks ago, the repairman needed rugs, wondered where the maids were and I told them they were sleeping. He found it strange and muttered — sarcastically — how comfortable the helpers’ lives were.
I’ve kept my peace about how they always seemed deaf to the doorbell in the afternoons. I never raised my voice whenever they asked permission to go to town for personal stuff, even when it wasn’t their day off. It took a lot of effort but neither did I raise my voice when they went out and left the stove on. Twice. The only thing they did with gusto, and with regularity without being told, was walking Twix around the neighborhood — and only because they did it in the company of the other helpers in the neighborhood. Many times, it took them an hour and a half to walk the dog and Twix is a toy dog. At the height of summer, whenever they wanted to spend several hours in the clubhouse pool, I never said no. When they wanted to play volleyball on the nearby empty lot with the other helpers, I let them — even though I knew that the real objective was to make themselves visible to the construction workers hanging out a few meters away.
Speedy locked the gates to the garden and laundry area last night. Surprisingly, when he got up this morning, the house helpers were back. They told him they climbed over the fence. Well, they managed to get to their room but not inside the house. That’s one great thing about the design of this house. The maids’ room is outside, the laundry area and a second kitchen are adjacent to it.
At 7.00 a.m., I called the helpers into the bedroom, asked where they had been and they told me their aunt (who stays in the adjacent subdivision) sent a text message, told them a relative was in town and they went to visit. So why didn’t they text us, I asked. No load, they said. Right. They had enough for tricycle fare — to and fro, and tricycle fare here isn’t cheap — but couldn’t spare P10 pesos to load up their cell phones. I asked them how many times they had done this in the past (we don’t ring the doorbell when we get home after 9.00 p.m.), making us think they were in their room when we got home late at night, then sneaking in early in the morning of the following day. They couldn’t answer. Imagine that. Maybe they were telling the truth about last night, maybe not. Maybe they were out with the construction workers. I didn’t really care. I only knew they had become a liability and I couldn’t trust them any longer. I told them to pack their things, they would get the remaining pay due them and then they could go.
The thing is, we have house helpers primarily because we don’t like leaving the house unoccupied. And coming home to find the house empty when we’re paying two people to make sure it isn’t just sucked. Big time. It was the last straw and I have had it. We’ve managed without live-in house helpers before; I don’t see why we can’t now especially since the kids are old enough to take care of their own space. And this is a much more secure neighborhood than the old one. If we decide to hire a new helper, I’d much prefer someone who only comes in daily. We can even get janitorial services so we won’t have to buy the cleaning stuff.
You will realize how liberating it is, I promise you, not to have to ‘get along’ with household help. Hindi na sila katulad nung unang panahon na may malasakit, kahit pakitaan mo ng maganda, para sa kanila, you’re just another job. Since we moved out of the Phils., Jay and I learned a whole lot about picking up after ourselves and relying on ourselves so that we don’t end up living in a pigsty… and that’s how we discovered what a good cook he is! We do have a cleaning lady come in for half a day every couple of weeks and believe me, it’s cheaper, more convenient and much more efficient.
Not that you asked me, but I think you’re moving to the right direction.
That’s awful….sobra naman sila…may afternoon nap pa.
I think that was the right thing to do.Their loss,ma-mimiss
nila ang luto mo.
i’ve learned about picking up after ourselves and cooking that i am now ready to seek employment. gagawa na nga ako ng karatula sa labas ng bahay namin:
Jay S. David
Computer Engineer
(tumatanggap din ng labada tuwing linggo)
baka gusto mo akong kunin na all around household help? ano ba tawag sa maid na lalaki?
House boy? Pwede ka balikan sa Irvine? hehehe
Hit and miss ang makahanap ng trustworthy and competent na house hold staff.
Sa panahon ngayon, mahirap na talagang kumuha ng efficient and reliable helpers. Dito nga sa bahay, tagabantay lang ng mga bata ang trabaho nila, nagrereklamo pa! Meron kaming naging yaya, one week lang umalis na saying nahihirapan daw siya. Nagtaka nga ang asawa ko kung ano ang mahirap sa ginagawa niya. Ako ang nagpapaligo sa umaga at nagpapakain sa tanghali. Ang asawa ko naman ang in-charge sa gabi. Tulog naman ang mga bata sa tanghali until around 4PM. So, ano’ng mahirap sa trabaho niya?! Since then, hindi na kumuha ng yaya ang asawa ko. Yun lang, ako syempre ang nag-sacrifice. Buti na lang na-develop ang mga home-based online jobs. May income pa rin kahit konti.
Jet, that was how we lived for over two years in the other house. A cleaning woman came in for half the day three times a week. AS for the mail, mailbox lang katapat nyan. Water delivery can be scheduled.
EmyM, yep, if they have that much time for their afternoon nap, you can imagine how light the housework is here with TWO of them
divingdividing the work. They don’t cook, the washing machine is fully automatic, most times, we go to the laundromat pa.JPEB, yes, true. But the reverse is also true. One of these helpers came from a household where the mother hen was mean (1 can of sardines per meal for 6 helpers). And she’s said so many times how lucky she felt when she came to us (helpers here eat what the family eats, we pay for medical and sick leave and 13th month pay and all those things, plus Christmas and birthday bonus). BUT she still went her merry way. Then, she was begging to come back. BUT NO MORE. When trust is gone, it’s gone.
Ever since I had my own household, I’ve been looking forward to the day when maids would be indispensable. And now that the kids are able to pick up their own toys and bathe themselves, I think I’m getting there. Right now, the maid is on leave and promised to be back in 2 months, but I’m not very enthusiastic. Buti pa sa wala.
And, yes, it’s very liberating… wala nang kelangan pakisamahan, turuan, kainisan pag palpak ang trabaho, at katakutan na baka kung sino sino pala ang pinapapasok sa bahay pag wala kami.
Alam mo bang yung dating katulong ng inlaws ko (we live in the same compound where maids live in a separate house) “adopted” 3 adults without our knowledge for several weeks?! And we even had a security guard ha – and he never told us! Grabe!
I know 2 families in San Lorenzo (Filipinos)and Valle Verde (Chinese) with big houses and without maids. They just have a cleaning lady/planchadora and a gardener come in 2x a week. Wallah! Peace and quiet… at malinis ang bahay nila ha.
Now if I can just find a “kid sitter” for when I have to go out of the house to attend hearings/meetings…
Gardener, there’s someone in the neighborhood that we can hire. She’ll just come to trim and water the plants, etc. And I’m more than okay with that.
Problem is the ironing woman. Shucks, that really isn’t my strong point. And I’m NOT willing to iron the clothes of Speedy and the girls ha. Kanya-kanya if we can’t get an ironing woman.
Suggestion #1: When a friend of mine brings her clothes to laundry service, may kasama ng hangers ang mga damit nya. Ang instruction nya sa staff ng laundry shop, as soon as clothes come out of the drier, hang them and konting pagpag lang para hindi na plantsahin.
Reason: Mainit pa yung damit from the drier and it is easy to straighten them even without an iron. Tipid na sya tubig at bayad sa labandera, nakatipid din sya sa kuryente kasi hindi na kailangan plantsahin.
Suggestion #2: Another friend has a stay-out laundrywoman who goes to her house Wednesdays and Saturdays. The laundrywoman also irons their clothes every Sunday.
Hi Connie! Now I know why you fired the maids! lol
Anyway, I only have one maid here and she lives out. She is only required to come early since my webwork renders me useless during the morning. She comes in, cleans house, maintains and upkeep all rooms (I have 3) and cleans the yard. She also cooks breakfast and lunch while I take care of dinner. She also cooks the rice before leaving in late afternoon. She goes home at 6pm. And I have a labandera who comes once a week. My maid takes care of the ironing.
The arrangement suits me well. For one, as a mother of 4 younger chidren, I still get to take care of them myself and they are still independent since I make them do some chores before going to bed and after waking up. I also like the fact that they are not alone with the maid since I stay at home 24/7. (one of the advantages of working at home– I know you enjoy the same as well).
You are right, you are probably better off without a stay in maid. Just get one of those stay out maids and let them come to do the laundry and major cleaning… You’ll actually save more money without them around since I have noticed that they can be wasteful at times too.
We’re making arrangements now. Alex has a classmate whose family is migrating to Canada and they have this daily cleaning woman who’ll be unemployed once they’ve gone.
It’s getting harder to find good and reliable helpers. It’s funny cause sometimes TAYO PA ANG TAKOT SA KANILA. We get scared to scold or correct them because we are afraid they will leave…
We are afraid that our helpers will leave us because we think we will be left handicapped. But these helpers don’t see the other side of the coin kung hindi rin nila tayo pakikisamahan. For one, saan sila kukuha ng income? Don’t give the dumb reason that a lot of people are looking for helpers. How sure are they that their future employers will be as nice as the present one at hindi sila aabushin? Kung mahirap humanap ng mapagkakatiwalang kasambahay, MAS MAHIRAP humanap ng MABAIT NA AMO!
VERY WELL SAID JOMANETTE.
We’ve had similar household help years ago. I personally thought they only made my younger sisters lazier than before since they did no chores at all. Letting them go was a more of a relief than a handicap as immediately, the next month’s electric bill dropped significantly.
Finding good & reliable help these days are just so hard.
It’s clear you don’t need household help unless with the cleaning chores, Sass, but you do have to give top priority to security details of the house if your initial purpose then of having maids was to always have someone at home. That was our problem too for many years until I opted for getting the house wired last year for ADT 24/7 security monitoring and remote callback, what with the times I’ve lost equipment from past break-ins with the most recent that happened to me a year ago. I’ve also been looking into non-lethal self-defense weapons to acquire this year as well. You’re right about not needing the complications of maids, but enough of being nice because as I’ve learned when it comes to defending your home and property, you have to make the outside world sit up and take notice that you’re not going to play passive.
LOL Ms Connie, reminds me of our helpers back when we were young. They were like family na rin – shared the same meals, napped whenever and wherever, you get the drift. Pag pupunta sa supermarket, ang tagal bago umuwi tapos may kupit pa lol. Manonood ng sine, am sure with the construction workers din lol. One time we spent summer in the province, pag balik ko suot na nila my favorite shoes and when I asked binigay daw sa kanila ng sister ko na nag-abroad na which wasn’t true at all LOL! buti na lang nice ako
now all “growed up” and independent, life is betterer. no headaches to deal with lol…
Mamsi, I agree. They have this attitude that getting along is a one-way street. We do our best to be good to them but they don’t reciprocate. And the thing I hate most — niloloko pa kami.
Jhay, what I expect to drop significantly is the food bill.
Ben, we’re adding more security measures, definitely. We thought of a motion detector before but we have cats so I don’t think that’ll work for us. The cats will set off the alarm over and over.
Donna, now that you mention personal stuff… After the helpers had left, Speedy found Sam’s Cross pen in their room. Apparently, they couldn’t bring it with them because Speedy inspected the contents of their bags before they left.
hi ms. connie. mas mabuti pa nga ang ginawa mo na paalisin na mga help. we have been doing without a maid for the last two years and at first, mahirap kasi nga nasanay na may naglilinis, etc. pero kaya rin naman pala namin. I even noticed that my 5-year-old daughter is pulling her weight as to keeping her room and things clean kaya sabi ko mas okay pa na wala ng kasama sa bahay. Mas nakatipid pa kami kasi less one mouth to feed and use the water, electricity, etc. We only hire a plantsadora when my husband brings home his military fatigues. hehe.
First thing you’ll notice, Connie about your new set up is how liberating it is, thinking that you no longer have within your household the maids that have been doing you more harm than good. It is good that you did not grant them another chance to do some more harm to you. This is when we will say—Tama na! Sobra na!
Our household is also “maidless.” Kaya when people ask, I say that I am the “maid of horror!”
Seriously, we’ve also had our share of horror stories na scripted at ginampanan ng maids…True, there are some sacrifices that we have to shoulder, but the bottomline is: are we better off with these “parasites” in our household? Lalo na if our sense of security is compromised. Tama ka, if the trust is gone,its gone.
By the way, ok ang design ng house nyo ha… hiwalay ang maid’s quarters from the main house.
Ms. Connie, may I know the names of your helpers?LOL kidding, just thinking that baka by sheer coincidence, mapunta sila samin. I’m now in the process of changing helpers too. Would you believe that the bf of one of the helpers had the gall na ipagpaalam siya samin na uuwi na daw kasi nahihirapan. And she does nothing but take care of my youngest daughter.
My husband would, at times, make “surprise” visits at home whenever he’s assigned here. Dun niya nahuhuli ang mga yaya na iniwanan ang anak namin, who has wet herself, while the other yaya was deep in slumber (humihilik pa) sa sala which is right beside our garage where the husband had parked noisily, if I may add.
As my friends and I keep on telling each other after each yaya horror story, malapit na kami makawala sa pagiging “hostages” nila. Lumaki lang ang mga bata, tsupi!
And another thing, I once had a young helper, who I learned only after I let her go, that she would smoke inside our house and chat with the constructions workers every afternoon.
Galit na galit din ako sa mga katulong na ang dami mo nang bitbit, and di man lang lumabas para tulungan ka.
Our helpers, the ones I fired, were 19 and 24 respectively. And it was the 19-year-old that was really a headache. Surprisingly, she texted Speedy earlier today, apologizing, Speedy said, “Okay, good luck na lang sa inyo!” She’s not dull so she sould get the message that we’re not taking her back.
they probably act this way because you give them too much freedom. I suggest that from the very start, you inform them the house rules, what you expect them to do and what they aren’t allowed to.
Don’t let them get away with something that you find disrespectful or wrong or anything that you have a peeve about. Its not that you should shout or strangle them to death when they make mistakes, just that you should explain calmly that you will not stand a second scenario of what happened. Be strict about rules, after all, you ARE the boss.
Oh they knew the rules. No leaving the house when we’re out. Day off on different days. Don’t let anyone in even if they say it’s Speedy’s mother or father or mine. They’re just flippant. AS to their free time which naturally varies everyday, well, I can’t begrudge them that. It is healthy for them to talk to other people, etcetera, instead of being cooped in the house waiting for me to tell them to do something. Just like office employees, if they finish their work early, they can go on breaks, you know? But then with house helpers or with employees, meron talagang mga sadyang pasaway.
Second this, Ms Connie
Just like everyone, helpers also need their rest and relaxation. Hindi naman puwedeng every minute they work kasi tao rin sila na napapagod 
When they’re done with the household chores, and in between doing such, nood pa sila ng fave nilang TV shows lol. If afterwards they want to make beautiful eyes with the construction workers outside, let them too. So long as they keep the house spic and span (hmmm, did they ever? lol), and babantayan ang house whenever we were not around. ‘Yun nga lang, ginamit na pala my fave shoes lol… (wondering now if they also wore my clothes while I was away lol)
I don’t think you had house helpers. Sounds more like bakasyonistas to me. And to think we only have one primarily to accompany my aging mother-in-law. She does the laundry, ironing, cooking, etc. And she does it rather well (most of the time). She’s a saint compared to yours. Good riddance, I say.
Wow, she does all that and keep you mom-in-law company too? Wala bang kakambal yan?
I once had a house helper for the same reason as you – we don’t want leave the house unoccupied. One time kasi we went home with a fire 2 blocks away from our house and we got scared that the fruit of our labor will be gone in a jiffy. So we hired a helper. We treated her as a member of our family. I even buy her snacks – chips, chocolate, etc. After a few months she developed friendships with other helpers and some useless guys in the neighborhood and this is when problems began. She asked my husband if she could join the volleyball league of our subdivision. Of course, we didn’t let her join because she’ll be practicing all afternoon. We reminded her of the primary reason why we hired her. Weeks passed and she had another request – if she can work at SM while she’s still employed by us. How could she serve 2 employers at the same time? We told her she can work at SM but she has leave. She chose us.
Then one day we came home a little earlier than usual and discovered that she’s not around. Right there and then we fired her.
We didn’t hire another helper since then. We just had a comprehensive insurance for our house and its content and we got the peace of mind that we wanted. We also rented a safety deposit box for our important documents and jewelry.
As everyone here had said – it’s liberating.
Gusto mo ako na lang i-hire mo? Magaling ako maglinis kaya lang kulang ang isang araw. Okey lang din ako maglaba basta naka-washing machine. Ayaw ko lang mamalantsa, mainit kasi.
Eh pano ba yan, ayaw ko din mamalantsa. hehehehe
Ms. Connie, natawa naman ako sa kwento nyo na uma-alembong ang dalawang katulong sa neighborhood contruction workers! Marahil gusto magpaligaw, kung tutuusin ay hindi pa naman sila huling biyahe eh!
Na-aliw talaga ako sa kwento nyo sa inyong house helpers. I am a follower of your blog and always look forward to your new post.
Wow. You sound just like my mom. But good call, we once had a maid who got pregnant while she was with us coz she would sneak out to visit construction workers/boys/drivers.
Connie, I echo the sentiments of your readers who said it will be liberating to finally let go of maids. Our helper left us to search for a greener pasture in Manila. In the first few weeks, it was difficult doing the dishes after breakfast and rushing to work in the morning. Then before we knew it, we got adjusted to the routine. We just had to wake up earlier and move faster. And the unexpected happened … our helper wanted to return to us, I told her, “Huwag na lang, sanay na kami ng walang katulong.”
A laundry woman came twice a week to wash clothes on Tuesday, iron clothes on Thursday and clean our place, wipe the dust, arrange things, etc.
Our son wrote in his blog one day that “We lived like an efficient nuclear family … ” Kaya mo yan Connie.
How uncanny, I was just thinking the other day after reading your blog that your house helpers have it real good. In fact, I even wondered what else they have to do since you’re SO hands on. Flick that sassy hair, and say bye bye bye! Parang lalo pa silang nakakaabala, kesa nakakatulong. Thanks, but no thanks, diba? Good for you Mom-Sass!
Re the helpers’ flirtations with construction workers.
The helpers were 19 and 24 respectively. But I was telling Speedy it really isn’t an age thing. I have an aunt who had this middle-aged helper (with a teenaged son) who would sashay around the house when there were guests around.
“sashay”? LOL. My friend’s helper, at 45 years old, nabuntis pa ng driver ng kapitbahay.
Anyway, being friendly with construction workers wouldn’t be an issue if not for the security factor. Ang daming nananakawan bec. const. workers beguile maids then break into the houses. I have two little daughter so imagine my paranoia should that happen.
Ms. Connie, how I wish that our time to be liberated from househelp headaches will come SOON.
“My friend’s helper, at 45 years old, nabuntis pa ng driver ng kapitbahay.”
LOL Like I said, it has nothing to do with age. So hiring someone older is not necessarily a solution. Cause Speedy and I discussed that — maybe, someone older and more mature would be a better choice. But then again, maturity does not always come with age.
true ms. connie. we once had a helper who was in her 40′s kaso makukunsumi ka naman kasi parang pako. kailangan pang utusan bago kumilos and you would think that at her age na she should know what should be done after telling her once. tapos, natakot pa kami ng husband ko kasi grabe humilik, parang barko, pinauwi na namin baka magka-heart attack pa.
That is very true! Age does not guarantee maturity. Sometimes, the older maids are, the more that they tend to be bossy… or yun bang tipong “know-it-all” na sila.
Hay… kainis talaga mga maid and yaya na maaarte. I had a lot of that in the past.. I hate it pa na kinokopya nila porma mo palage. Pag nagshades ka.. shades din sila ng mga cheapipay tapos mahihiya naman pag tumingin ka sa kanila. At ang sweldo makikita mo pumupunta lang sa pangkolorete at kaartehan. Tapos pagcheck mo sa sink.. ang yucky. Kainis talaga. Spot check nalang nga gawa mo bagsak pa palagi… kung wala lang talaga ko work and 2-year old son..di ako magha-hire ng kasama..sakit ng ulo. I can clean the house naman kahit may work..but because i have my toddler I need to spend time with him. Yaya and maid na nga parang lagi pa din madumi house minsan kasi puro kaartehan ang inaasikaso. Ewan..iba na talaga panahon ngayon.. I got new yaya and maid na mukhang ok naman pero nowadays… kadalasan sa umpisa lang tapos pag medyo comfortable na sila sayo..may abuse na mangyayari..kaya dapat din treat them like part of your family pero may boundaries dapat..they need to know na ikaw pa rin ang amo at masusunod.
We had a helper a few years back who spent her earnings for pasa-load to her boyfriend in the province. LOL
hahaha the irony of high technology these days…
I live in the US and everybody pretty much keep up with their household chores-no house helps but gosh, sometimes when you go to their home, it was a disaster and more so if they have pets and the house smells very dirty and the hairs all over the place and even on their clothes. Can’t stand it!
I think we Filipinos likes to have an organize and clean house but its like it’s a gamble to find a good and responsible help. Good luck on the new arrangement!
..and sureness they deserve relaxation and time to socialize with others din.. pero kung nilalabas nila anak ko para umarte imbes na for my toddler to socialize and learn from other kids and to exercise na din.. abah wag nalang lumabas…kung ano pa matutunan ng anak ko sa kanila. Minsan nga i went out sa neighborhood with my son..aba dami ko nakausap nagkwento about my former yaya na sikat pala sa kaartehan sa neighborhood at puro pacute din sa mga construction workers.. very disappointing talaga. Meron pa nga ung sinaktan anak ko.. gosh.. I don’t want to share na all the details or else baka maiyak na naman ako. You can’t really trust them 100% .. minutes of leaving your child/children to these folks ..a lot of things could happen kaya never trust them fully talaga. Bihira nalang sa mundo ang pede itrust pag dating sa mga yaya and maid..baka nga wala na talaga totally!
Great move! Naku, mahirap talaga kapag ganyan ang kasambahay mo. Mabait naman naging kasama namin sa bahay,yun nga lang naging tamad ang anak ko at mas magaling pa mag-utos kesa sa akin. When our kasambahay left, my son learned to do the chores, washing the dishes and sweeping the floor.Like you,I dont like ironing our clothes, kaya “hinihiram” ko yung maid ng kapitbahay sa weekends para maglaba at mag-plantsa
Wow, tons of comments on this post,eh.
I am pretty sure your household can survive without any live-in household help. Kids grown up, already.
We in Canada do everything by ourselves (name it, we do it). There is no help available; yes, those with lots of money to splurge on live in help can.
With almost all appliances and cleaning gadgets around, it’s much easier to maintain the upkeep of the house and the chores around. Good luck.
Equal distribution of house chores should be in the agenda.
Hi Miss Sassy. Gone are the days na may efficient “all-around” maid. I remember when we were young, we only have 1 stay-in maid. She wakes us up (i have 1 sister), bathe us, feed us, cleans the house, do the laundry and ironing of clothes and cook. Now, running my own household, grrrr…. gusto nila specific job nila, watching tv nakataas pa ang paa. Ung isa, maryosep, nag-away ng BF nya, NAGLASLAS ANG LUKALUKA!Pinatahi ko pa ang sugat, ipinagamot and complete meds bago ko pina-uwi. Geez! Ayaw mapagalitan, ayaw mapagsabihan. They drive me nuts!!!! I hope time will come, that I will be able to liberate myself. Hehehe. Love your site!
Naku, access to TV is one mistake I’ve learned in the past. In the old house the TV was in the living room and the helpers could use it. Shucks, nothing ever got done on time! Noontime, it was Wowowee, all afternoon, neverneding telenovelas. So, when we moved, the TVs are in the bedrooms only, the helpers have a radio/cassette recorder in the room and that was it.
Ms. Connie:
In the past, we hired my father’s relative from Cebu as our maid – pero di sya tumagal kasi nung binisita ung relatives namin dito ayaw nang bumalik.
Ang hinala ko, ginamit lang kami para makapunta sa Manila (grrr…)
Hehehe! Don’t you find it funny? Masyadong “mabili” or popular ang thread na ito! Isn’t that so indicative of how many households have been under the spell of these house helpers?
On the opposite end of the scale naman, I had a maid who was with us when my son was in Grade 1 till he was in First Year HS. This is one maid whom I miss so much…para akong pampered with her around. She just had to go because she passed the PEPT or the equivalency exam wherein pwede na niyang tapusin and naudlot nyang pag-aaral. She finished HS, then, when she called me on my birthday last year, she was already in Singapore. Ayaw ko sana syang pakawalan dati, pero I thought, sino ba naman ako upang pigilan ang ambition niya in life? Yes, I know, she is quite rare!
Sobrang popular nga I am sharing with my newspaper readers some of the comments here hehehehe
Naku.. we have 3 maids who have their own tasks pero away ng away. Nakaka STRESS.. We have a cook.. (been with us for 10 years almost ). pero it takes her 2 hours to prep and cook 1 dish ha…. May juice and snacks pa habang nagtatrabaho… I just let her be kasi matagal na siya.. Pero what i cant stand is PAG NAGAAWAY na sila…
The only reason i need three is because my MOM is ill and neets constant attention….
They tend to ABUSE din lalo pag MATAGAL na..When i buy items for myself, bibili din sila pag kaya naman.
Haay… naku, siguro if someone will writ a book about them, i’m sure BIG HIT YAN….. hehe….
Hi Ms. Connie. Good you let go of your unreliable house helpers. I grew up with yayas and maids but we haven’t had stay-in house helpers for 5 years now especially since we’re now just a few adults in the family at home. We do the cooking, and the laundry ourselves since there’s always the washing machine (something I think no household can do without).
We just have a househelp/cleaner and a planchadora come in to do the work once a week (for the cleaning) and once a month (for the ironing). It’s more manageable, there’s less headache, and you get more privacy. I kinda don’t like the idea anymore of having stay-in maids unless we have kids at home and would need all the help we can get. hehe! Love your site by the way.
Yung katulong namin, pinasibak ko agad kay CIC. Nagbabalak bang mag member ng KMU! Pati katulong sa kapitbahay nire-recruit…
Nagpapatawa lang po. I’m just imagining a scenario…
maid namin may sariling tv sa kitchen, may sariling cr sa room, walang ginagawa sa maghapon kasi gabi na kami uumuuwi, binili ko pa ng cellphone kasi luma na daw cellphone nya. walang batang binabantayan kasi 2 lang kaming mag-asawa. nawawala sa araw at ewan ko kung nasaan nagpupunta kaya pag may door-to-door di nadedeliver kasi walang magrereceive. daming nawawalang gamit. di ko nga lang mahuli kasi wala nga ako maghapon at hanggang gabi.
minsan nagsabi sa asawa ko na “kuya, me alam ka bang ibang malilipatan na malaki pasweldo?” sabi ng asawa ko, “sige hanap ka dyan sa paligid (sa subdivision). tapos pag weekend ka na lang maglinis sa amin kung gusto mo. daily na lang bayad namin sa yo. tipid pa kami, mas malaki pa kita mo.”
ayun, alam nyang di kami takot mawalan ng maid. mag-aask lang ng raise di pa derechohin. eh pano namin itataas sweldo nya eh sweldo ko di tumataas (3 taon na nakapako sweldo ko) eh di naman nadadagdagan trabaho nya.
eh balak pa nga naming pag-aralin sya dati kaso wala naman kaming nakikitang improvement sa kanya.
winiwish na nga lang ng asawa ko makahanap ng ibang work yung maid namin para alang problema. ako lang mamomroblema kasi ako ang gagawa eh drained na ako sa trabaho ko pa lang. di bale kung ordinary 8-5 job lang ako kaso hinde. pano pag nagbuntis pa ako?
hay, sana yung maid na makuha namin sa susunod yung katulad ng maid namin sa bahay ng nanay ko. she has been with us for more than a decade and pamilya na talaga sya. pero di sya stay-in ha. wala akong masabi: mabait, magaling magluto, magaling magtrabaho, mapapagkatiwalaan.
whoa! a barrage of anecdotes. inspite of, i am grateful for helpers because they make our life easier
to be fair (ayoko gamitin ang “in fairness” lol), there are the caring and responsible ones naman. such as the two who looked after me and my siblings when we were younger 
but, of course, time came when they too had to raise their own families. yes, they are rare. thanks for baking the most delicious cakes, cooking our fave ulam, keeping us company when the parents were away, applying band-aid on our sugat, making us listen to those nora aunor and imelda papin songs lol, for just simply being there 
After reading the comments, katiting lang pala ang problema sa maid namin.
Hi, Ms Connie. I always read your column, Sassy Lawyer and Feast Asia.
Jusme! I can relate to your horror story, in the beginning it’s actually you who make pakisama and then aabusuhin ka na later! Kaka stress!
When I heard the old Anita Ward “Ring My Bell” song, it reminded me of our maid when I was still a kid. Not enough that she danced crazy gyrating for the entire day with the same song, then for entire week sometimes in her bra if my parents were away. Not long after, she moved out and worked for the beer garden (what a term??) which I passed everyday on my way to school. Months later, I saw her sprawled on the dirt road crying that she wanted to die coz she was pregnant and the madam pulled her back to the beer garden. It was sad and a nightmare experience.
During my first work in Makati and lived with my aunt in Las Pinas, a maid of my age lived across became a frequent tambay in my aunt’s place watching TV. One day, she cried that her master’s son made advances and walked around naked at night. She asked my aunt if she could worked for us but she was not needed. I gave her fare so she went back to the province. Later, Lola told me that she caught few times of the maid going inside my room while I was asleep or glancing at the door gap when I was changing. I never thought about it.
My thought was on the several maids in the neighborhood who got pregnant taken advantage by their master. It was the height when the maids became the safe outlet since George Estregan died of aids. It was hard to figure the life of these household helpers and limited mental grasp. They cannot think how lucky they are, when you treat them well.
I remember my cousin’s maid. Grabe and porma daig pa ang amo hahahaha!!! And yes they are flirting with construction worker and sometimes may cat fight pa. Grabe talaga at ang mga mukha sobrang pula kabibili ng astringent na napanood sa commercial.Buti na lang dito sa US hindi uso ang maid:))
Hi Connie,
Grabe talaga mga katulong ngayon. Sa akin 2 years lang ang tinatagal ng mga maids, kasi they become too familiar sa atin kasi mabait tayo magtrato sa kanila. Kaya nga di mo alam kung ano ang maganda pakikisama sa kanila. Pag mabait ka aabusuhin ka pag malupit ka naman, konsensya mo naman ang kalaban. My maid of 2 years from dumaguete left bec. of her family problems. She’s trustworthy at maayos. Now i got a stay out maid, pero di pala ok ang stay out kasi you always watch out pag lumalabas sya, Just now I told her na huwag ng bumalik. I think mas liberating nga ang walang kasamang iba sa bahay. Mas maayos, mas malinis. Haay!
Hi, i found your post and the comments fascinating. I moved to Canada with my family when I was 6 yrs old in 1973 and i remembered what it was like with to have maids to look after my brother and I. I did recall then feeling that it was my birthright to have someone to do everything for me and found it odd that no one had maids here in Canada. I have grown up learning to do things for ourselves and hiring a cleaning lady to come every two weeks is a luxury. I’ve had a cleaning lady come maybe about 5 times in my lifetime during those phases in my life when it was difficult to maintain the house.
Not a birthright, definitely. More of a culture thing.
hello everyone!,im angel from cebu.i work as a house helper.. i have been working til now as a house helper with same employer for almost 6yrs..minsan maliit ang tingin ng ibang tao pagganyan ang pinapasukan mong trabaho..sometimes i feel pity for myself but i dont mind them,co’z they dont help for my necessities..i like my employer,hindi naman cguro ako mag tatagal kung hindi sila gusto. aside from that they like my service to them because i work well with or with their supervision,detailed-oriented,hard working and organized..i have respect for my employer..para akin,i dont think about the money i received or make a dagdag..i do care about my good service to them..and about freedom,well,lahat naman ng amo ay binibigayan ang isang maid na mkapag day off…oo minsan may pagkakataon na gusto mo pang maglibang but as being employed,u must have ur rules for discipline in ur self that u must to follow..and to think about the rules the rule sa boss mo..kung my personal na outing,u can ask a favor to ur amo,and tell the truth why u like to go out,or something…and im sure they will convinced them..kung magiging tapat ka lang.